Meet Heather Zoccali | Founder and Director of Atmosphere

We had the good fortune of connecting with Heather Zoccali and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Heather, what was your thought process behind starting your own business?
The process that led me to this has been a long one but the real culminating moment that led to starting a business, emerged a few months after my eldest son was paralyzed in a hit-and-run vehicle accident.

March 10, 2015. One day, one moment would forever alter our family’s lives in ways we could not possibly imagine. Five minutes after leaving our home on his walk to school, and roughly 1000 yards from our house Connor was struck by a driver, thrown 25 feet in the air, and left alone in a ditch, unable to move from the waist down on that cold spring morning. Making the incident even more impactful than the obvious catastrophic injuries Connor suffered were the moments just before- we had a terrible, drag-out yelling match about grades and commitments, and responsibilities. Often typical in households with high school-aged teens, yet this one was bad and…and, I did not tell him I loved him before he walked out the door, slamming it behind him. I ALWAYS told him I loved him and reminded him to make good choices, but not that day.

It took me a long time to work through the guilt of that moment-. I was not patient, I was not kind, And then…he was nearly killed and left for dead. I did not protect my son, I could not fix him, and I didn’t tell him I loved him.

We spent the next 2.5 months together at Craig Hospital in Englewood, Colorado, a world-renowned Spinal Cord and Brain Injury rehabilitation hospital. While my husband, kept things going at home with our youngest son, Connor and I learned how to re-live life. And I met other parents, spouses, and partners going through the same thing. One evening, after a long day of wheelchair classes, and personal needs guidance, I asked a few of the others if they wanted to go for a walk and find a cocktail…because I sure needed one. One of the moms asked,” Can we do that?”. I said,” If ever there was a time for a martini, now is it.!”

It was during this brief respite that the idea for starting a program focused on providing support to family caregivers began to form. I had been in a caregiving role my entire life: first, with my parents my father suffered a major stroke that left him paralyzed on one side of his body and lived with Multiple Sclerosis, my mom and brother live with mental illness, and my older brother struggled with an addiction that led to sexual abuse in my younger years. So I was a youth caregiver before I even knew what that was. Fast forward to 2020, I went home when my younger brother called asking for help with my parents. I had made the deliberate choice to not be involved in my family’s life-it was not healthy for me. When I returned home to KY my parents were both really sick both mentally and physically. On day 3 home my father passed by suicide and it was clear my mother was in advanced cognitive decline; end-stage Alzheimers and Vascular Dementia.

I found myself in the familiar territory of self-forgiveness, acceptance, and caregiving.

I have also been on the receiving end of care. Right before my 30th birthday, my health started to decline. I found myself bedridden, spending weeks in the hospital, having seizures, renal failure, adrenal crisis, and P.O.T.S with no answer to what was going on. During this time of being cared for, I saw the toll it took on my family. My husband had two young boys to care for and a sick wife and had to work, and keep the house going and I saw the life draining out of him. I watched as my boys anxiety of what is going on with mom and while I could not be there physically I tried to be there emotionally and we talked about it all.

Through these experiences, I saw commonality: Isolation, depression, financial strain, physical exhaustion, loss of self, and the dark emotions that come with caring that no one talks about: Ambitious Grief, Anger, Shame, and Guilt.

This all led me to develop Brutally Beautiful’s mission is to provide innovative and intentional nature-based healing programs for caregivers and women.

We believe in turning our pain into power; We live what we like to call a brutally beautiful life.

What that means is that while we have experienced profound hardships, as many of you have, we’ve found that by opening up to the pain, and letting love fill the cracks in our hearts, we have actually grown stronger, and have found such joy and happiness despite the brutal moments this life has given us.

What should our readers know about your business?
Brutally Beautiful’s mission is to provide innovative and intentional nature-based healing programs for caregivers and women.

We believe in turning our pain into power; We live what we like to call a brutally beautiful life.

What that means is that while we have experienced profound hardships, as many of you have, we’ve found that by opening up to the pain, and letting love fill the cracks in our hearts, we have actually grown stronger, and have found such joy and happiness despite the brutal moments this life has given us.

At the core of what we do is work with nature and holding spaces for women/family caregivers to be witnessed, heard, listen to, and supported.

I am always honored to first have caregivers/women trust that we have them, while we will not have the exact lived experiences we do have similar ones and “get it” and we are fierce with holding a neutral zone for all to heal. (Politics, religion, etc are left at the baggage claim because we feel everyone deserves a space to heal ).

As they enter in, knowing all the hard work it took to even get to this point, the anxiety at leaving their loved one and actually taking a moment for themselves, to learning to celebrate and use their power of voice/choice to share, connect, and reset.

Watching the interactions at our closing gathering is such an honor; I watch women come in as strangers and their lights are dim, to seeing them grow, let their guard down, cry and laugh- they own their power, voice, and choice and are now on the path to being truly seen and heard; and they leave making life-long bonds and tools to continue the BB Mindset.
I will never stop feeling the magic of that moment.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
We love living in Fort Collins, CO, and have been here since 2004. The area is filled with fantastic outdoor recreational opportunities and lots of amazing restaurants and breweries

If someone was here in a week in e summer the itinerary would include:
Atrip to Rocky Mountain National Park for glorious hiking and views of the CO fourteener peaks; a white water rafting trip on the Cache Le Poudre River, and an afternoon beer or cocktail stop at one of the local breweries.

This is an extremely bike-friendly community we would bike down to our favorite Italian restaurant Rare for an evening happy hour snack and martini. Check out what live music was happening in the Fort Collins Town Square.

We would have to have a day at Lory State Park for a hike, fish, and paddle around Horsetooth Reservoir.

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
My husband, kids, and his family have been unbelievable support throughout every step of our journey and I have no words that could ever express the love, kindness, and support they give me unconditionally. I could not have executed the original vision without the support of 11 strong, fierce, dedicated women who also happen to be caregivers who have chosen to give their time and energy to this effort to make programming happen and truly change the course of other caregivers’ lives.

Jamie Penn
Elizabeth Miller
Rachael Martel
Jamilyn Kraft
Arianna Kilmer
Rachel Davis
Kathy Stalknaker
Sue Burleson
Maggie Bristol
Audrey Goral
Caira Benson

Website: https://www.brutallybeautiful.life/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brutally.beautiful.life

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/heather-zoccali-015a3b18a/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/brutallybeautifuladventures