Meet Alexandra Ballensweig | Founder and CEO, humhum

We had the good fortune of connecting with Alexandra Ballensweig and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Alexandra, how has your perspective on work-life balance evolved over time?
I used to see these two as something to keep in balance because I felt out of control within the work I was doing, and didn’t have the personal insight to navigate my own energy, or the boundaries to protect it. Now I don’t see work and life as at odds. My work feels integrated into my purpose, my relationships, and my well-being. What I think this topic gets at is personal wellbeing, which I think is a byproduct of how well we are honoring ourselves and our energy, and how we allocate our energy daily and over time in alignment (or not) with our broader values. If we are giving energy successfully to the things we value, we feel energized, successful, and well.

I hack my own system every day by waking up some time between 430 and 630 am to do a yoga practice, get out of my own way, tune into myself, and then I can take on whatever is needed and most important. Its this dedication to my practice that helps me move through sluggishness, lack of motivation, confusion, etc. more easily and keep showing up to the things I care about. I see taking rest or idle time also as valuable and essential to creativity, and navigating my energy so I can give to the people, projects, and causes I care about.

Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?
humhum (woman and LGBTQIA+ founded) is a digital platform for authentic connection, and romantic possibility. Through our virtual guided group and 1-1 dates, we’re setting a new standard in online dating for the post-pandemic zeitgeist; mindful, growth-centered, and substantive. “Discovery,” e.g. finding people to date, is only part of the challenge. Connecting with them, and having self-awareness to navigate the discomfort of a new connection is where people struggle. Transactional swiping is out, personal evolution and human connection is in.

I created humhum to offer a new kind of container to date within, with new rules to play by; one that feels generative, supportive of well-being, and enjoyable. Dating can feel good and empowering when people are validated by what is in their control—their growth, not by the success of their matches. We know that dating can feel generative rather than depleting when people invest time and energy learning, evolving and connecting rather than judging, hoping, messaging, and ghosting. On this new platform, and in this new paradigm the dating is a practice; the process is the focus, and personal growth, and authentic connection is the measurement of success.

The current dating paradigm focuses on the outcome—a successful match, which leads to people feeling insecure, defeated, and frustrated when they spend time swiping, chatting, and meeting and it doesn’t “work out.” Online dating is correlated with poor mental health. Studies show that people who using dating apps are likely to be more distressed, anxious, or depressed. Dating apps are not cutting it. Studies also show that Americans who’ve used existing dating platforms in the past year felt more frustrated (45%) than hopeful (28%).

There is missed value in the dating process if we see it as a means to an end—the value is in the growth and learning that can take place with intention, with each new connection, and with reflection—we have the opportunity to cultivate self-awareness, compassion, discernment, tenacity, and confidence. We believe that the outcome; finding a partner happens naturally as we lean into our own growth.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
Hit up RA MA Institute on the lower east side for yoga and meditation or a gong bath Try Public Records for an awesome plant-based dinner
Go to Prospect Park for a long walk or picnic
Enjoy a local brew at The Other Half Brewery In Domino Park
Join Siri Rishi Kaur for Kundalini Yoga at Temple 143: https://temple143.com/retreats/
Join the Joylist by Jillian Richardson for updates on all things connection in NYC
Check out Get Away in Greenpoint for a booze-free mocktail, and brunch https://www.getaway.bar/

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
RA MA Institute where I hosted the first ever humhum experience, and my friend Andrew Badr, for helping me get the first bit of tech off the ground.

Website: https://www.humhum.space/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/humhumspace/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/humhum

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCV7bW-iAUgYsYbpaAOxh1w

Image Credits
Lindsey Kimura, Ray Gannon