We had the good fortune of connecting with Bryana Kappadakunnel and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Bryana, is there something you believe many others might not?
When it comes to parenting, the hot new conversation is around ‘scripts’. Online and in books, you’ll see hundreds of parenting educators and professionals giving scripts for parents to use in a variety of situations: tantrums, discipline issues, and more. Here’s why I’m really hesitant about giving parents a script: they’re like a band-aid on a broken leg. They may hide what is broken momentarily, but eventually you’ll have to deal with the broken leg.

This is why I teach parents the art of self-reflection. When we come to terms with both the positive and negative aspects of our upbringing, it allows us to better connect with our children organically in the moment. We don’t need to be told what to say, because our presence, affection, and attunement flows as a result of better knowing ourselves. The scripts may make us feel good for a moment, but self-awareness is evidence-based for promoting more secure relationships for a lifetime.

Can you give our readers an introduction to your business? Maybe you can share a bit about what you do and what sets you apart from others?
I’m the CEO of Conscious Mommy, an online community that is dedicated to helping parents become the conscious parent they never had. I speak to the heart and soul of raising children: we want deep, meaningful connections with our kids, and for many of us, we don’t have a roadmap to get there. We’re stuck, because we’re unconsciously reenacting our childhood wounds. Wounds around not feeling seen. Not feeling heard. Not feeling understood. Not feeling safe.

Raising children is a gargantuan task. It asks so much from us on every level humanly possible. And it’s my goal to help parents feel more effective with how they parent. I want to see parents feel confident and at ease with their choices. I want to see parents make decisions that consciously align with their values, rather than decisions that unconsciously reflect their upbringing.

For the past 11 years, I’ve listened to exhausted parents share their story with me in the therapy room, my in-person groups, and within my online community. I often hear things like: “My kid just doesn’t listen to me! I can’t deal with all these feelings! I’m so triggered by their behavior! Something must be wrong with my kid! This just isn’t what I thought it would be.”

Overtime, I began to see a common theme: the parents who struggled the most with their children’s emotions and behaviors were usually the parents who had complicated childhood experiences. While it’s true that raising kids is not for the faint of heart, it’s an especially challenging prospect when you were not effectively parented and you are actively avoiding repeating your past hurts.

After years of deconstructing my own trauma background and becoming a mother myself, the Conscious Mommy mindset became my mission. I wanted to help parents do the work they desperately needed so they could finally become the conscious parent they never had.

I teach parents how to transform their family life by taking 3 primary action steps: break the dysfunctional cycles that they don’t want to pass down, adopt a needs-based mindset for more compassion and grace for everybody, and master communication, boundaries, and discipline without punishment or shame. I’ve helped thousands of families find their way to connection on a deep, profound level. And we’re only getting started. I believe firmly that we can change the world in a huge way, one child-parent relationship at a time. And that’s exactly what I’ve sought out to do.

If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
As a mom of 2 young children, I want to share some of my favorite places for families with young children. Our top activities are the Long Beach Aquarium, the Santa Monica Pier, the Cayton Children’s Museum in Santa Monica, the Natural History Museum, the Science Center, and the LA Zoo. We’d definitely eat at Proud Bird so the kids could play outside and watch the planes land. We’d hang out at any of the amazing South Bay beaches, enjoy the Pointe in El Segundo, and have dinner at any of the great restaurants in the Riviera Village in Redondo Beach. For a mom’s night out, I’d have to say a fancy dinner at Sugarfish in Manhattan Beach followed by some shots at Shellback Tavern makes for a night to remember.

Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
The number one person I’ve learned the most from is my own mother. As complicated as our relationship was, I wouldn’t be doing the healing work with parents and their children if it wasn’t for our experiences together. A close second is my long-time therapist, Dr. Nabil Hanna. Dr. Hanna helped me see that I’m worthy of love. He supported me through a difficult spiritual transformation in my mid-20s. He played a substantial role in my re-parenting process. He taught me everything I know about being in healthy relationships and setting boundaries around dysfunction.

Website: www.consciousmommy.com

Instagram: www.instagram.com/consciousmommy

Other: TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@consciousmommy Online Workshops & Classes: learning.consciousmommy.com Free Stuff: www.consciousmommy.com/newsletter

Image Credits
The Boho House

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