Meet Dr. Kim Van Dusen | Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Registered Play Therapist
We had the good fortune of connecting with Dr. Kim Van Dusen and we’ve shared our conversation below.
Hi Dr. Kim, how has your work-life balance changed over time?
Trying to achieve balance is one of the most difficult aspects of being a parent and a business owner. I have learned over the years to accept the days I don’t get everything done and give myself grace when I can’t do everything. When I first started out, I said “YES” to every opportunity that came my way. I worked long hours and put my business first more than anything or anyone else. But by doing this, I was doing myself a disservice. I ended up feeling guilty about not being more present as a mom and I also was mentally, emotionally, and physically drained and burnt out. I became resentful, irritable, and tired. So I learned to pull back on the business and spend more time making wiser decisions about how I was spending my time and ultimately more particular on what I said “YES” to. I eventually learned to say “NO”, I learned to set boundaries, and I learned to ask for help. No parent and no business can survive alone. I learned that it was ok to not get to everything on my to-do list and to leave emails after 5pm unread until the next morning. I learned to only say yes to opportunities that made sense and brought something significant to my life. I also learned to give 100% to what I was doing in the moment, whether it was working or parenting. You can’t do both successfully everyday. You can give 20% to everything you need to accomplish, but that often leaves you exhausted from excessive multi-tasking and toxic productivity. Something has to be a sacrifice for the day, something ends up suffering. To achieve ultimate balance, you need to take chunks of your day and dedicate that time period to that task. So now, on some days I work all day and other days I spend the day cleaning my house, and other days I dedicate the day to not working at all. It’s not to say that I don’t dabble in a little of everything each day, but I don’t schedule too much and I don’t do too much. When your expectations of yourself and your day change, that is when you find balance.
Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?
I have a very eclectic background and I have pulled aspects from all areas of my life to lead to the success of my business. After I graduated from UCLA, I went on to receive my first Master’s degree in Broadcast Journalism from Syracuse University. After working in the entertainment industry for years at places like E! Entertainment and Entertainment Tonight, This is where I learned skills of the media as well as promotion and publicity. I became an Account Manager for Clear Channel Communications, working in syndicated network radio. It was here that I learned the business trade of negotiating as well as other aspects of sales, advertising, and marketing. After years of wearing suits and traveling on business trips, I went back to grad school and received a second Master’s degree in Marital and Family Therapy and my Doctorate in Psychology. After years of practicing therapy, I became a Registered Play Therapist. I then shifted my career and became a Program Manager for a non-profit and implemented a Positive Behavioral Support program in 20 elementary schools in San Diego. That is also the time when I became a parent and all my personal and professional experience collided and “The Parentologist” was born. A few years later, I opened my own private practice and began sharing my wisdom and advice on social media and podcasts as well as local television and various written publications. I am now currently finishing my second year of hosting my own podcast, The Parentologist Podcast, and am in the process of writing my first book. I love what I do and I love being in charge of how my business runs. I love creating a flexible schedule for my myself and also love being able to contribute a significant income for my family. I have worked very hard over the last 7 years to cultivate this lifestyle and my business has come a long way. I can’t see where it goes next!
If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
I lived in LA for a decade of my life and I have some of the best memories living in the area. If I had a friend visiting town, I would definitely take them to Venice Beach, the Santa Monica Pier, and Malibu to spend the day on the sand! I also love visiting the La Brea tarpits and the Griffith Observatory. There are so many wonderful places to eat and drink in the city, and some of those places are on the rooftop of hotels in West Hollywood. I also love a good sushi restaurant.
Who else deserves some credit and recognition?
I dedicate this shoutout to my husband and my two children. There have been many people in my life that have been part of my journey and that have helped lead to my success, but my family is my ultimate support system and inspiration.
Website: https://theparentologist.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentologist/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/drparentologist
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theparentologist
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeynDIIDbQyLW3Yu6uv0gEw?disable_polymer=true
Other: Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-parentologist-podcast/id1568620347 Threads: https://www.threads.net/@theparentologist Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/parentologist/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theparentologist
Image Credits
https://www.chrissywalther.com
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