Meet Emily Fernandez | Poet, Writer, and English Professor

We had the good fortune of connecting with Emily Fernandez and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Emily, looking back, what do you think was the most difficult decision you’ve had to make?
When I think about the word “decision,” I think about crossroads where both paths seem to offer an awesome payoff (and a person must sacrifice one for the other), but when I consider my life, I don’t ever remember being in a situation like that. In the case of my life-direction, whether it’s as a poet or professor, I just lock into this burning desire to get what I want, and often, without even being fully conscious of it. I tend to blindly attempt something or over-confidently jump in, and then I fail at least three times in really big ways. I am thinking specifically of my attempts at getting into grad school, getting a tenure-track job, getting a poetry book published – even getting a driver’s license. Finally, I become frighteningly obsessed with that goal. Either I get it, or I continue to fail. There is a lot that I keep attempting and still fail to achieve. Honestly, I don’t know if I have ever truly believed that I decide to succeed; it is more a matter of compulsion to keep doing something even if it becomes an act of self-flagellation. One thing I do know is that poetry rarely offers a feeling of success in a practical sense. I know of only a few poets who have made it and became a “poet” as a full-time life-sustaining gig, and almost no one I know goes into poetry for material success or even fame – at least not in this day and age. Poetry is a labor of love or self-delusion. I guess, after all this rambling (sorry!), I finally understand how to answer the question: the most important decision I have made was to fully succumb to my inner longing to write poetry and stories and then to share it with people despite the reality of rejection. Poetry can feel silly at times, especially in the face of the devastations we experience globally and privately, but the longing to find beauty (and truth) in a shared language – I mean, it is what has fueled me for so long – I cannot turn my back on it now.

Alright, so let’s move onto what keeps you busy professionally?
I am very proud of my new book of poetry Pliny and Other Problems. My first book The Procession of Martyrs was very serious. It was dealing with the ways we give of ourselves and lose ourselves and it did so with a focused sensibility. This new book is more playful, more neurotic, and sometimes just weird. It’s more true to my voice. I think we have all been in state of absurdity and overwhelm, from politics, to the pandemic, to climate change. And that’s not to even scratching the surface of our own inner turmoils (especially as many in the Gen-X face middle age); the loss of loved ones, failures, and even just having the strength and energy to take care of ourselves and bodies. I think the last half of the book really is about me coaxing myself out of my malaise, my low-level depression. It looks at how nature has persisted as one aspect of healing. I hope it offers that to readers, too.

If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
I might invite someone to my usual place on Saturday mornings: El Porto Beach. For one thing, it has fairly clean bathrooms (for a beach, anyway). But seriously, I would hang out at the café (i.e. Surf Food Stand), maybe we’d enjoy breakfast burritos and cappuccinos while digging our bare feet in the sand. We would go for a long walk to the pier, collecting shells and taking obligatory photos. I would make my guest(s) stand under the pier and look at the waves crashing along the pillars until they had some glimpse of the meaning of life. Finally, we would take a plunge into the cool water while trying not to get hit by a die-hard surfer, and if my guests were daring, we would swim even farther out to where the juvenile sharks are known to lurk. In the afternoon, I would pick up some pupusas and horchata from Deliciosas Pupusas (yes, it’s located in a car wash) in El Sereno and head to Ascot Hills to check out the native plants and the city views, or I would take them to Highland Park Brewery in Chinatown, get a good buzz, and wander the adjacent Los Angeles State Historic Park, while taking more obligatory photos of the city skyline at dusk or the jacarandas in bloom. Finally, we would end the day at Benny Boy Brewing in Lincoln Heights to sip apple wine by an open firepit.

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
I would be remiss not to shout out Mark Givens and Dennis Callaci from Bamboo Dart Press. They are neither pretentious nor opportunistic in their approach to publishing. They are solely focused on the collaboration and creative play that can happen in the publishing process. They’ve also published some of my favorite local writer: Juanita E. Mantz, Cati Porter, Tim Hatch, and Romaine Washington.

Also, I want to shout out the Catholic Workers and volunteers who run the “Hippie Kitchen” on Skid Row. They create an amazing outdoor space for the guests of their long-running hospitality kitchen. The conversations that I have had with both the volunteers and guests have always been lively and deeply enlightening. It’s a life-giving, life-loving environment with lush trees, mosaics, and chattering birds, and I am so honored to spend my time there buttering bread, cutting veggies, filling up cups with water, or just sharing the delicious salad and beans with really good people.

Website: https://emily-fernandez.weebly.com/

Image Credits
I don’t know who took the pictures of me — my husband or kids. I took the last one of the water bottle. Please feel free to crop.