Meet Ruben Dario | Actor & Comedian

We had the good fortune of connecting with Ruben Dario and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Ruben, why did you pursue a creative career?
Oh, I became an actor because at a young age I realized that I wasn’t good at anything except humor and I use that term loosely. I also didn’t have a care in my heart or a thought in my head. Then I said to myself how can apply those skills to what I want to be when I grow up and since influencer wasn’t a thing in the 90’s its either actor or congressman. I ended up choosing acting because I wanted to have job security, a stable income, and peace of mind when I chase validation from strangers while crying in my car at a meter outside of 200 south La Brea over a rejection email from an audition that starts with “we loved your energy.”

Alright, so let’s move onto what keeps you busy professionally?
My acting and comedy journey? Picture a motivational poster, but the puppy’s on fire and the inspirational quote is mispeled.

What sets me apart from others? Honestly, probably my inability to quit despite the universe begging me to choose a stable career like ghost hunting or a director of food and beverage. I have a gift for turning emotional breakdowns into punchlines and making audiences laugh while they silently wonder if I’m okay (spoiler: he dies at the end). Also I’m hung.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
So fun. Here’s the itinerary:

DAY 1: Hollywood

• Breakfast: Go to Sqirl, because who doesn’t want to pay $17 for burnt toast with fermented jam and a whiff of hipster superiority?
• Hollywood Walk of Fame: Step over names you’ve never heard of while dodging Spider-Man impersonators that smell like stale weed and crushed dreams.
• Lunch: In-N-Out. Because it’s mandatory, and you have to pretend it’s life-changing, even though it’s just… good fast food.
• Evening: Go to Runyon Canyon at sunset. You’ll get a workout and a front-row seat to a sea of influencers “accidentally” being filmed.

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DAY 2: Venice & Santa Monica

• Brunch: Head to Demitasse where you’ll pay $14 for a coffee and a vibe.
• Venice Boardwalk: Bask in the aroma of patchouli, fish tacos, and street performers that might either be geniuses or just… loud.
• Santa Monica Pier: Ride the Ferris wheel while you contemplate how it’s simultaneously magical and mildly depressing.
• Dinner and drinks : The Bungalow – ask Paul about the gin lemons and $40 nachos.

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DAY 3: DTLA
• Breakfast: Eggslut, because nothing says “Los Angeles” like waiting 45 minutes for an egg sandwich with a porn name.
• The Broad Museum: Free, artsy, and air-conditioned. Pretend to understand modern art while subtly taking selfies in front of the infinity pool.

Sleep rest of day

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DAY 4: stay in bed all day and binge the Rocky movies. Discuss how the film Rocky IV single handily ended the Cold War.

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DAY 5: Silver Lake & Echo Park –

• Coffee: Intelligentsia – where the espresso is third-wave and the judgment is first-class.
• Thrift Shopping: Dive into racks of overpriced irony at Jet Rag or Wasteland.
• Echo Park Lake: Rent a swan boat. It’s cute until your legs cramp and you realize you’re stuck mid-lake with no exit strategy.
• Dinner: Vegan tacos from a truck that also sells car insurance.

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DAY 6: Theme Park Madness
• Universal Studios: Because it’s cheaper than Disneyland and the tram guides anecdotes are filled with hate and what could have been.

• Dinner: Nothing like ending a day of overpriced butterbeer and screaming children with a $25 fishburger at Bubba Gump. Also make sure you yell “run Forest,run!” At your server. They love that.

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DAY 7: Chill (AKA Burnout Recovery)
• Spa Day: Wi spa – naked, scrubbed within an inch of your life by a 80lb 70-year-old korean man with the strength of a Norse god.

Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
Shoutout to The Second City for teaching me how to be funny — because apparently, my natural charisma and crippling social anxiety weren’t cutting it. Thanks for the lessons in “Yes, And,” the art of pretending I know what I’m doing, and for helping me monetize my childhood trauma through tasteful and self deprecating punchlines. Couldn’t have done it without you. Well, technically I could have, but it would have cost me several thousand dollars more if I went The Groundlings route.

Website: https://theuselessweb.com/