We had the good fortune of connecting with Selsela and we’ve shared our conversation below.
Hi Selsela, how do you think about risk?
I think risks are important. I also think it is important to keep in mind that what you might view as risky might not be risky to another person. It is crucial to not compare your journey and to other people’s journey, that is risky. Because if you do you might take on their fears and regrets and not go after your dreams. If you have the dream of being a singer and an actor like me, and you have no one in your circle that went after a career like that, you will get a lot of advice that will not serve you. Like “you should try a safe career” or “maybe you will never make it” or “you don’t know anybody that can help you, you should do something else” or “what will others say about you, you shouldn’t do it”. They gave me a list of risky things that could happen and I do have some scarcity thoughts in my mind. Looking back I realize that not taking the steps towards my dream would have been the riskiest scenario of them all. Not being able to sing for people and to act would make me miserable. Not trying to make the thing I am the absolute best in to become my reality would have been the biggest risk of my life.
I think risks are important in our lives and every time we meet a “risk” we should recognize it as a potentially life-changing moment. I had to decide if I want to drop out of University and pursue acting full time or if I want to study and pursue acting afterward. My thought was “let’s finish studying to have something to fall back on just in case”. All those chatters around me got to me and all the advice I heard was not in my favor. I analyzed it a little more and found myself to be thinking all wrong. I knew I wanted to act no matter what and there was no other option for me, so the actual risk is to be in University and waste precious time studying something I would end up never using. That scenario of building and creating something very popular called “a Plan B” became THE risk for me and I dropped out immediately.
If I see something in my life as a risk I know it is another teaching moment to really look closely and look for the true risk. Sometimes the more comfortable choice, the safer route, the suggestions of others, and the experience of others are your true risk. Don’t base the outcome of your life and your dreams based of the fears of others and society standards. Trusting your heart feels like a risk sometimes, it did to me, but it turned out to be the least risky thing that I’ve done in the pursuit of my own happiness. All those contacts I didn’t have I met them by taking action in the direction of my dream. And the phrase “What will others think of you?” was meant to scare me into thinking the world will think badly of me. It turns out that I got a lot of positive feedback, from people watching my projects, to winning an award *The Celebrity Experience”, to casting directors from around the world wanting to work with me.
On the other side of risk is your dream life waiting for you. In my opinion, the risk is not meant to scare you, but to prepare you for your personal greatness. That is what I experienced risk to be.
Let’s talk shop? Tell us more about your career, what can you share with our community?
I am not sure what really sets me apart from others but I can for sure tell you how I view myself and how others tell me how they view me. I think I have very strong traits that I am very happy and proud of to have. I am resilient and I am determined, I love to work and I won’t give up on my dreams because I’ve seen myself make other dreams of mine happen. My friends tell me I am the sunshine in human form and Casting Directors tell me I am good at taking directions and visualize their vision, they appreciate my work ethic and my transparency.
To be honest I didn’t always have those traits but once I realized that you can train yourself to become the person you want to be I started working on it with more focus. I started to think about what are more things I want to be and what are some traits I want to have. Most of my thoughts are always around acting and singing and I envision how I want to be, where I want to be, and that gives me a pretty good idea of what I need. I also have to be honest and say that it wasn’t easy to change, I had to unlearn things in order to embody the new traits that I wanted. That requires a lot of mental control and concentration. I invested a lot of my free time in mental health and personal growth instead of doing”fun” things people in their 20’s do. I encountered a lot of judging from people that were my friends, that didn’t understand that I needed acting more than I needed clubbing, I needed acting more than making new friends, more than dating. The cause and effect of those different views and plans that we had caused me to lose friends and even family members I thought would understand, it caused some people to not be nice to me because I handled situations differently. I view hard moments as lessons we can learn from but getting wounded and scared in the process is inevitable and I still got hurt. I am not bulletproof to hurtful comments and people treating me wrong but I know that I am strong enough to leave the situation or the person who is not right for me. No matter if family or not.
I would love the world to know to take a piece of advice with them. What made me stronger and made me survive the bullets coming my way were motivational quotes. In my experience, they always mean something else for everybody. Just read them and ask yourself how does that applies to me. Listen to motivational podcasts, speeches and listen to their interpretation and then ask yourself how does that applies to me and my life. That is so amazingly life-changing. And guess what if you interpreted in a positive way there Is no wrong interpretation even if there can be millions of interpretations.
Meaningful quotes can teach you life lessons.
I give you one quote that changed my view of myself “your weakness is your strength”. As a kid, I used to get teased by my teacher and classmates for being a dreamer, for being too sensitive, and for being too nice. I now get paid to live my dream, my sensitivity and vulnerability on camera is what they need me to show, and being too nice is the only thing I tolerate from everyone that wants to be in my life and the good thing is I can expect it because I provide it. Since I embraced that I developed the most beautiful and fulfilling relationships with people. Another little tip if someone tells you “you are too nice, you are being naive, you will only get used” that person just told you what they think you are, how they view you, and their intention.
Being nice is not naive it is a strength most people are scared of owning.
Any places to eat or things to do that you can share with our readers? If they have a friend visiting town, what are some spots they could take them to?
I love it when my friends visit me. I love to explore places I haven’t been to yet or places I have not gone to for a very long time. I love going to the mountains, so one day’s trip would be to visit the mountains. I also love to picnic. I love to try out new adventures so I would take my next friend that comes into town up a mountain where it is still snowing of snow has fallen. I would fill a basket with Swiss chocolate of course, because who doesn’t like the best chocolate. There would be some self-made finderfood, a mango salad, a really nice banana milkshake and with tones of desserts. Let’s be honest the best part about eating is dessert. If I wouldn’t make it myself I would buy the best black forest cake, which I happened to have found 4 years ago in a vegan bakery. I would make some tea to keep us warm, I would make some coffee for them to go, which probably would be some pretty bad tasting coffee because I don’t really like it anyways. But I would make up for it by letting them pick the song playlist in the car. I always fall in love with the scenery on almost all my trips, so I would stop at every pretty little spot and take 1000 pictures of them and the place and of me.
I have very close friends that I want my international friends to meet. One of my best friends’ fiance is a chef and has cooked in some of the best restaurants in town. We always meet there for a get-together and for a night full of cardgames and lots of winning and losing, laughing and excitement.
Switzerland is very small so it is very easy to travel to other countries, other cities and to places that people speak a totally different language. We would go to all these places and spend a day in a different place. I also love swimming and in my city, we have a lake and a little river I like to go to. On our chill days, I would make sure to spend my days close by the water at lake Zurich or go swim at “lette badi”.
I love to cook myself, I have some recipes that I came up with and I like for my friends to try. I know I would cook most of the time and on the days that I don’t my mam will probably cook. She is an amazing cook and always creates a magical food experience. When I was little some of my classmates came to my place not to meet with me but only to eat my mam’s food.
I would make sure we do fun stuff and relaxing activities as well. I love a balance between action and relaxation. I think the combination makes a trip magical.
Who else deserves some credit and recognition?
– George Caceres – and George Caceres’s book: Do the Hustle
– Wendy Alane Wright
– Adrian R’Mante
– Tru Collins
– Malcolm Nair (personal growth coach, company: Guided Intelligence)
– Nazila Hussein (Empower Massage Therapy)
Other: https://linktr.ee/selsela.a here are also links to more press about me.
(no specific person took the picture. None of them requested to be credited and all of them were either purchased or taken on my phone for my personal use. )