Meet Darshawn Hooker | Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist & Adjunct Professor

We had the good fortune of connecting with Darshawn Hooker and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Darshawn, how does your business help the community?
You know this has been a question I ask myself every six months. Not because I don’t view my profession as valuable to the communities I’m a part of, but because the way I view my work is that there has to be more than just the title or profession. I decided many years ago that the work I do as a licensed Marriage and Family therapist had to be impactful beyond the cliché sayings, “my therapist is the best” or “I love my therapist.” I wanted to create a space that allowed for a unique, individually curated, authentic connection between myself and anyone that allowed me to work with them on their mental health journey because at the root of it all is human connection.

Often times on television or in the media we see or hear these depictions of therapists as rote, monotone, hollow-shelled humans ready to just be a listening ear to be emotionally dumped on. They depict us as the cardigan wearing, clipboard holding, peering over the eyeglasses type. That, quite frankly, ain’t ever been me. Therapy is already invasive, intrusive feeling by nature so I couldn’t imagine sharing my greatest joys and most painful losses with someone I couldn’t connect with or whom I didn’t feel understood me. I’ve always challenged oppressive systems, rules and and methodologies that were not inclusive; the ones I couldn’t see myself or family and friends in.

I truly wanted to create a mental health space that was unique and allowed people to experience a journey towards a healthier and happier life. I understand that the experience needed to be reflective of real life and not just what is taught in books. I knew that people needed to feel connected. At our core, we all need to feel heard and seen. We want to feel understood. Being myself is the best way I found I could actually help folks.

Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?
This may be a bit repetitive but it just makes sense! Recognizing that to be born non-White in our society inherently means that their will be challenges unknown or unheard of by the dominant culture, I understood early in my career that many of our struggles come from having to wear masks of many colors, sizes and shapes to be acceptable in society. Providing treatment is both an art and a science, so when it came to focusing on my community directly, I knew that Black people needed a different representation of therapy and therapists. I knew that to connect and establish trusting relationships folks who looked like me would need to feel heard, seen and safe. The best way I know how to do that is well, by being real. Most of my work involves supporting Blacks, indigenous and other people of color through their mental health journeys that often involves a variety of trauma, childhood, sexual and to be quite frank, resulting from existing in our society as a Black or Brown person; transgenerational trauma. Anxiety, depression and many other mental health battles become exacerbated by the reality that most of us are unable to develop, sustain and enjoy being our authentic selves. I set out to be sure that every person I am privileged to work with understands they can cultivate the version of themselves that understands the parameters they exist within but also not allow those parameters to hinder their growth or barricade their path towards self actualization; the optimal, healthiest, happiest version of themselves.

Nola Light Healing Center is a place where anyone is welcomed and when you decide to allow me to be a part of your mental health journey, you receive a genuine therapeutic connection. I want those that collaborate with me to be able to see the possibility that being authentic, not without possible negative outcomes, is an option. You do not have to be who the world tries to force you to be. So I personally show up every session as me. I wear my comic book graphic tees and fresh kicks that make me feel good. I speak AAVE and use other common slang terms or phrases because that’s a huge part of my culture. I have piercings and don’t hide my love for music as you’ll always hear music playing in the lobby. I laugh when things are funny. I eat snacks and drink water. I am human. So in the session room, you get to be human too and if you’re not quite sure what you want that to look like, the space is safe for you to figure that out. I’m riding shotgun but you get to drive.

In addition to this one of the awesome things about the work I have been doing lately is merging mental health and play! I believe that the more play we add to our lives the more joy we will experience. So The Elf of Mental Health was born! I love dress up, themed parties and fantasy! Recently a day for Black people who love all things, elf or fae (fairy) was created entitled “Black Fae Day” to highlight that we are out here being Black and enjoy cosplay and dress up too! The Elf of Mental Health is a half elf half fairy persona that talks about mental health on YouTube, providing answers to questions folks may have about mental health topics or seeking mental health support for themselves. It’s rejuvenating to put on my elf ears, play in makeup and fairy wings, prancing around barefoot in a random park thinking about how to help folks meet their mental health goals!

The most important work I can do is help folks cultivate their happiness, access more joy and heal from any pain from the past. I was created to do that and will always ensure that I keep that at the forefront of every business endeavor.

Let’s say your best friend was visiting the area and you wanted to show them the best time ever. Where would you take them? Give us a little itinerary – say it was a week long trip, where would you eat, drink, visit, hang out, etc.
Oh wow! So this is quite possible because I have so many amazing friends all over but if a friend came to town and wanted to have an amazing experience I’d first have to ask what they WANTED to do versus what I think is the best for them. One thing about me is I want other people to always feel that they can be themselves and do the things that make them happy around me. The entire trip would be centered around helping them enjoy their time with me and feel carefree.

If they were cool with doing things I like, I’d pick them up and take them for comics and lunch! We could dig around in crates for dollars comics because I love introducing people to comics and seeing the joy of looking for a really cool one they connect with. I’ll probably end up buying their comics as a rites of passage and then maybe grab tacos near the beach for lunch. Tacos are delicious! Then maybe we would take a nice nap, falling asleep to “Lord of the Rings”, extended version! After that recharge we are hopping in the ride to head to Eighty Two, an arcade bar not to far outside of Downtown LA! Nothing like a nice battle on Marvel vs Capcom and a adult beverage! Clearly we need more tacos so the taco truck outside is a must and once we have spent our tokens, we head in for the night.

I’m pretty simple so unless I’m throwing a party, back in the days before the pandemic, most of what I do is simple fun!

Who else deserves some credit and recognition?
This is a difficult question to attack because I feel like there are tons of people, experiences etc that have shaped my success. I’ll try to be concise and give a few examples personally and professionally that have propelled me like a rocket directly into this field.

Firstly, my spiritual connection has really blossomed since doing this work which has enhanced my confidence and hope in the visions I’ve had for my career. I always felt that I was divinely created to do the work I do and just had to find a way to make it reality. Secondly, my parents have been immensely supportive of everything I’ve done throughout my entire life. From showing up to every musical or play I was in, words of encouragement and support for social activist work or helping cater the opening for my private practice. They are two of my best friends. Lastly professionally, I have met amazing folks in the field of psychology, one being Dr. Cheryl Grills, a mentor I’ve had since I was an undergraduate student at Loyola Marymount University. She is a force to be reckoned with, Dean of Psychology, social activist and mental health practitioner. She helped me be grounded and trust that I was right where I was supposed to be at pivotal moments in early adulthood.

I also have to shoutout the folks who didn’t believe I’d be where I am. Throughout my academic journey and even in my career I ran into many people who would tell me I would never be successful. Looking back on those moments, many of their complaints were deeply rooted in anti Blackness. Statements like I was too unprofessional with the way I dressed and wore my hair were attempts to box me in. I was often told the way I talked or connected with folks wasn’t appropriate for a therapist. Now would you look at that! Almost 15 years into my career, I consistently get to hear folks say that being myself, from clothing, to speech is what helped them feel safe.

Moving forward as to not give that too much energy, my friends have all been amazing! They listen to me, let me be my weird quirky self and celebrate my hard work. If I need a day to unwind, an hour to vent or to sit in silence, they’re there for it all. It’s wonderful to know that people can love you the way my friends love me. I have an amazing village!

Website: Linktr.ee/Theelfofmentalhealth

Instagram: www.instagram.com/urfavtherapist

Facebook: www.facebook.com/DarshawnHookerLMFT

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbDkG-pQiG2PhQTmbOZm6ow

Image Credits
Tash Elzie Muammar Reed